What’re your needs in life?

Do you know what your needs are and how to communicate them? For ages I didn’t know what I needed. The thought of even thinking about what I needed was so foreign to me as I had been giving endlessly to others. I didn’t even consider that I too needed things to satisfy me.

When my friend asked me this question, I looked at her puzzled- “What do I need? That’s such a selfish thought”. Selfish? Why did I think this was selfish to state my needs? Well, I can safely say that it was the subtle undercurrent of our society that had conditioned me to think and believe that my needs didn’t matter. As women, we are also conditioned to put everyone else’s needs before ours as that’s what a “good girl’ does- she gives and gives and gives till she’s all dried up with nothing left for her. I gave so much of myself away to others- boundary-less, that I was feeling like that shrivelled old prune- not knowing why but feeling a mild resentment towards everyone, including myself- “What about me and my needs”!

Well, fast forward to today and I KNOW what I need- my body tells me! Having a relationship with your body is the KEY to FEELING INTUITIVELY what it is that you need. Is your body telling you to rest? Is it telling you to take a holiday? Is it telling you to speak your truth to that friend who doesn’t listen to you? Is it telling you to stop that toxic relationship? I know you feel it on some level within you what you need, now where’s the incongruency stem from not acting on your needs? Is it fear of failure? Of not being liked. Is it setting up a boundary that feels scary to do so? Or is there guilt for putting you first over others?

Just last week I took a week from seeing clients because my body was screaming at me to have more ME time. So, I did it- it was hard as I went without income for a week but holy shit, do I feel so much more invigorated and renewed again! I am no more a shrivelled-up prune but a perky little peach again 😊